Election 2012: Putting words in their mouths

Facing, like you, months on end of political speechifying, Editorial Board members have fortified themselves by imagining some political pronouncements they’d really like to hear, from some orators who will seem familiar and others who definitely will not.

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Theoretical speaker: Fear Itself

Topic: My hiatus

Greetings, Americans. Fear here, with an important announcement about the campaign.

Over the years, I’ve been on the ballot a lot. And I’ve won — a lot — with the help of my dedicated supporters. I know that many of you have been working hard to ensure that this year is no exception. Frankly, you needn’t have given it so much effort. When I run, I really can’t lose.

Nevertheless, I’ve been at this a long time, and I need to give it a rest. I’d like to spend more time with my family, especially my domestic partner, Cynicism, with whom I’ve maintained an uncivil union for lo these many years. I’m willing to let the legacies of the 2012 campaign belong to someone else.

Several candidates remain in the race, including Audacity, Sagacity, Humanity and Authenticity. I can’t say I’d endorse any of them individually, although together they might amount to something.

Like all good rock-ribbed political players, I’ll be back before you can say boo. Try not to wreck the place while I’m gone.

DAVID BANKS, ASSISTANT COMMENTARY EDITOR

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Theoretical speaker: Any legislative candidate

Topic: The state’s biggest challenge

Minnesota has one overriding challenge in the next two or three decades. It’s to improve the productivity of its workforce as the large, well-educated baby boom generation retires.

The state will fare well if it can keep the boomers and Gen Xers healthy and productive for as long as possible while rapidly bringing following generations up to speed. That work will require more-effective education, more adult retraining, more-affordable and universal health care, more-efficient infrastructure, more safety in our neighborhoods, and a fairer, more-competitive tax structure to pay for it all.

Anyone who says that Minnesota has a spending problem, not a revenue problem — or vice versa — isn’t telling you all you need to know. Minnesota has a productivity problem. Solving it will require

You can read the rest of this article at:: http://www.startribune.com/opinion/commentaries/160890005.html

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Posted by RobertButler on Jun 30 2012. Filed under 2012 Presidential Campaign. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry